Many
well-meaning brothers and sisters enthusiastically point out ayat from the
Qur'an and Ahadith that reveal the Islamic injunction to cover our bodies so
that the maximum that may be seen are our hands and face, expecting us to just
as enthusiastically accept and begin obeying this injunction. Perhaps we are
convinced of the moral, social and many other benefits of hijab, and maybe even
begin to desire to cover ourselves, but it is almost never that easy. There can
be many consequences that come out of Islamic covering that, although they
should in most cases not be used as excuses not to cover, must be considered
frankly and seriously before beginning to wear hijab full-time.
1. Yourself
Whether you
are a convert to Islam or were born into a Muslim family but have never
covered, you must prepare yourself mentally for the way your life will change.
This involves being thoroughly convinced that covering is a command from Allah,
as well as knowing in your heart and being capable of explaining to others all
of the benefits and logical reasons for wearing hijab. Without this inner
committment, the outer appearance is meaningless. You must also be prepared to
accept the added responsibility of being a visible representative of Islam, and
therefore be on your best behavior, being kind, fair, polite and following all
of Allah's injunctions. You can no longer mix with non-Muslim friends in
Islamically disliked situations; no more riding the fence. If you want to be a
Muslima but remain inconspicuous among the kuffar (unbelievers), then you are
not ready to cover.
2. Family
American
families will probably have more difficulty accepting your covering than Muslim
ones, but that does not mean you will not face opposition in either. Both types
of families can be ignorant of the fact that covering is considered a command,
not a cultural choice. Try, very slowly, to explain the benefits of hijab, the
drawbacks of not covering, and why you personally have a burning desire to do
so (yes, it should be burning, or you're not ready). I must emphasize that this
is a slow process, which should be coupled with discussions of other aspects of
Islam and your good example. Help them to see the whole picture and the
benefits Islam has brought you. If you are too afraid of their reaction (as I
was), write them a letter. This way you can express all of your points without
being interrupted and flustered. But be careful to be loving and respectful,
not pushy or threatening. You must also be prepared yourself to endure and
remain strong in your faith, no matter what their reaction is. Prepare for the
worst. Don't cover until you can accept whatever happens.
3. Employer
This can be
a delicate area, since we have seen that many sisters have unfortunately lost
employment for following Allah's command to cover. In this case, also, be
prepared for the worst, but stay positive. Write a very professional letter,
avoiding too much religious discussion, and emphasizing that your appearance
will remain professional and will not affect your job performance. Refer to
your "right" to practice your religion freely, and that covering is a
religious requirement that you have recently reached the level of faith to be
able to fulfill. Be polite (don't threaten them!) and emphasize that it is just
a small piece of cloth, not to be blown out of proportion. If you are unable to
reach an agreement with your employer, contact CAIR (Council on
American-Islamic Relations) at www.cair-net.org or a similar organization to
advocate on your behalf.
4. The Public
This concern
varies from state to state, city to city, but you must be emotionally prepared
to be stared at, perhaps even yelled at, and remain firm in your convictions.
This does not mean you won't be startled or shaken, but such incidences should
not be able to scare you into taking off your scarf. You must also be able to
explain, quickly and well, why you are covering because you will be asked!
These are wonderful opportunities for da'wah if they are used well.
5. Clothing
By this
point, you can see that there are many important aspects of wearing hijab that
go far beyond the clothes themselves, but they are, of course, a factor.
Depending upon your previous wardrobe, it may take quite some time and money to
make it more Islamic. My advice (and they way I did it) is, as soon as you
begin to consider covering, even though getting the other aspects in place is
far off, start slowly adapting your wardrobe, and your style of dress. I began
by not wearing shorts outside the house, then no short- sleeves, then wearing
untucked long shirts with pants, and eventually adding the scarf and more
modest clothing, after I had worked through all the previously mentioned
factors. For me, this was an 8 month period, but it can take more or less time.
You will know when you are ready because you won't be able to stand going out
uncovered anymore and doing what you know is right is more important than what
anyone else thinks. Changing your wardrobe in this manner is easier on your
pocketbook, as well as for your and your family to get used to. Once everone is
used to seeing you in longsleeves in 100 degree heat, a little scarf won't seem
like that big a deal.
I have tried
to break down into the major components what preparing to wear hijab should
entail. I certainly do not want to scare you out of covering or imply that is
is acceptable to wait for long periods of time waiting for the perfect
situation in which to cover. On the contrary, you will be held accountable to
Allah for any command of his that you do not obey when you are thoroughly
convinced to do so. However, He is also the Compassionate, the Merciful, and He
realizes all that is entailed in taking this step. Ask continually for His help
in making you strong in your faith and convictions, and learn as much as you
can about the reasons for a benefits of hijab, as well as about Islam in
general to keep your faith pusing you forward in your efforts to obey Allah.
Whatever situation you are in, never think you can't do it. If one of the above
mentioned steps is a stumbling block, work on it, don't use it as an excuse.
When I began
covering, I was a 21-year-old senior in college, working part- time in a
nursing home and about to begin student-teaching in a public high school,
living with my Christian parents when commuting to a small Catholic college in
an area that has more cows than Muslims. My only Muslim supports were my
husband and my American convert friend who was not covering. The nearest mosque
was a two hour drive away, and I had only seen three other covering Muslimas
here in my lifetime, and they were all visiting from out of town. And yet, by
August of 1994, I couldn't stand it anymore, sent letters to my employer, my
professors, my parents and grandparents, and started covering. My family and I
have had a few good cries, and I have had some funny comments by the elderly at
work, but all in all, everyone has gotten used to me and within two to three
months all the crises were over and life is back to normal...except that I no
longer worry about being flirted with, I feel respected and respectful, and am
very proud to have the priviledge of being a positive example of Islam to a
community that has very little experience with Islam or Muslims, and explaining
it to many who know nothing about it.
Hijab opens
so many more doors than it closes, spiritually and socially. It is unfortunate
that there are so many obstacles to our finding this joy and fulfillment, but
our best course of actions is to be aware of them, deal with them, and continue
this form of jihad (struggle) in the way of Allah. Insha'Allah we will all
receive great blessings and heightened spiritual benefits from our efforts to
obey His wise commands, and never forget, no matter how difficult it is, that
Allah never puts burdens on us that we cannot bear, and the more we persevere,
the more blessings we receive, insha'Allah. Whatever point you are at in your
spiritual growth, remember that Allah knows what is in your heart and will not
expect more of you than you are ready for. So keep preparing yourself, so that
when your time comes, you will be a strong, glowing vision of a person
thoroughly committed to submitting herself to Allah, and proud of it!
Niyaz Khalil
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